Georgia Dawg

An 80 year old couple were having problems remembering things, so they decided to go to their doctor to get checked out to make sure nothing was wrong with them. When they arrived at the doctor's, they explained to the doctor about the problems they were having with their memory. After checking the couple out, the doctor tells them that they were physically okay but might want to start writing things down and make notes to help them remember things. The couple thanked the doctor and left. Later that night while watching TV, the old man got up from his chair and his wife asks, "Where

And Mr. Green Jeans!!!

Isn't she a little young to be trying out for the Aflac duck voice?

You spent how much on your prom!!!! I nearly spent that much on my wedding! But I can get married several times, but there's ONLY ONE PROM!

Beany and Cecil The Jetsons Underdog

A backhoe and a dozer...

I thought this said PORN time in Atlanta. After looking at a couple of these pictures.... it was close...

I hate to be the one contributing to the delinquency of a minor. I'd be called the cops.

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What does a woman have 2 of that a dog has 4 of? What is it that is about 8 - 10 inches that protrudes from a man's body?

2 minutes.

Sure, no problem. But that's because I don't take random drugs.

I bet your foot doesn't hurt any more.

Some people don't reply because they have that person on Ignore and the request is never read.

Ask Obama why he's investing our money into drilling in Brazil instead of her in the US.

I believe it has 4th grade.

I had the A-1 burger at Burger King. It was Delish...

I just wished, when he came out, that someone had shouted "Gun! Gun!". It would've saved the taxpayers a lot of money.

You got to give Mondale props for selecting her as a running mate - even though they lost...

Sometimes removing that piercing will help.

Often if you feel like you're smothering it's likely that the pressure is not adjusted high enough. Don't be afraid to ask about adjusting the pressure. Mine has been changed twice from 9 to 11 to 13.

She hoped to live long enough "to attend the inauguration of the first woman president of the United States."

The locking bars serve no useful purpose aftrer installing a garage door opener - power or no power. When the power is out, the garage door still won't open. You have to engage the emergency release in order to release the door assembly from the horizontal closing mechanism (chain or screw). Once the door is opened you can close it manually and once in the closed position the emergency latch will engage against the closing mechanism and lock the door closed without the locking bars.

So, how many more appeals can he now exercise? One for each of the US Districts and then the US Supreme Court?

Don't mix Coca-Cola with Bleach...