Jennie
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Is this the same DR. Raines that is in the office with Dr. Bickford(Dentist)? That is so sad, we will keep him in our thought and prayers.
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Joke of the day:
One summer evening during a violent thunderstorm, a mother was tucking
her small boy into bed. She was about to turn off the light when he
asked with a tremor in his voice, "Mommy, will you sleep with me tonight?"
The mother smiled and gave him a reassuring hug. "I can't dear," she
said. "I have to sleep in Daddy's room."
A long silence was broken at last by a shaken little voice saying, "The
big sissy."
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eld Fans... Click Here!
Word Play
1. Two antennas meet on a roof, fall in love and get married. The ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was excellent.
2. Two hydrogen atoms walk into a bar. One says, "I've lost my electron." The other says, "Are you sure?" The first replies, "Yes, I'm positive..."
3. A jumper cable walks into a bar. The bartender says, "I'll serve you, but don't start anything."
4. A sandwich walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Sorry we don't serve food in here."
5. A dyslexic man walks into a bra.
6. A man walks into a bar with a slab of asphalt under his arm and says:"A beer please, and one for the road."
7. Two cannibals are eating a clown. One says to the other: "Does this taste funny to you?"
8. "Doc, I can't stop singing 'The Green, Green Grass of Home. '" "That sounds like Tom Jones Syndrome." "Is it common?" "It's Not Unusual."
9. Two cows standing next to each other in a field. Daisy says to Dolly, "I was artificially inseminated this morning." "I don't believe you," said Dolly. "It's true, no bull!" exclaimed Daisy.
10. An invisible man marries an invisible woman. The kids were nothing to look at either.
11. Deja Moo: The feeling that you've heard this bull before.
12. A man takes his Rottweiler to the vet and says, "My dog's cross-eyed, is there any thing you can do for him?" "Well," says the vet, "let's have a look at him." So he picks the dog up and examines his eyes. Finally, he says, "I'm going to have to put himdown." "What? Because he's cross-eyed?" "No, because he's really heavy."
13. Apparently, one in five people in the world are Chinese. And there are five people in my family, so it must be one of them. It's either my mom or my dad or maybe my older brother Calvin or my younger brother Ho-Chin. But I'm pretty sure it's Calvin.
14. I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day but I couldn't find any.
15. I went to the butcher's the other day to bet him 50 bucks that he couldn't reach the meat off the top shelf. He said, "No, the steaks are too high."
16. A man woke up in a hospital after a serious accident. He shouted,"Doctor, doctor, I can't feel my legs!" The doctor replied, "I know you can't - I've cut off your arms!"
17. I went to a seafood disco last week and pulled a mussel.
18. Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly; but when they lit a fire in the craft, it sank, proving that you can't have your kayak and heat it too.
19. What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh.
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New Home
When Little Johnny's family moved into a new double wide trailer one of their former neighbors dropped by. Seeing Johnny out front, he asked, "So, how do you like your new place?"
"It's terrific," Little Johnny answered. "I have my own room, my brother has his own room, and my sister has her own room. But poor mom is still in with dad."
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Hannah
I'm dyslexic and attended a conference about the disorder with a friend. The speakers asked us to share a personal experience with the group. I told them stress aggravates my condition, in which I reverse words and letters when I'm tense.
When I finished speaking, my friend leaned over and whispered to me, "Now I know why you named your daughter Hannah."
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Joke of the day:
An elderly lady came to see a young male doctor with her husband.
After the consultation was finished, the elderly man suddenly asked the
doctor for a piece of paper and a pen. Although a strange request, he
complied, and the man quickly wrote something, then handed the folded
piece of paper to the doctor. He told him to read it as soon as they had
left.
The doctor thought that the man perhaps had an embarrassing medical
complaint he didn't want to talk about in front of his wife, so the doctor
didn't hesitate in obeying the request. Once the couple had left the
room, the doctor sat down and read the piece of paper. It's contents
were thus:
"Doctor, your fly is undone!"
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The Conspiracy
Have you noticed that stairs are getting steeper.
Groceries are heavier.
And, everything is farther away.
Yesterday I walked to the corner and I was dumbfounded to discover how long our street had become!
And, you know, people are less considerate now, especially the young ones. They speak in whispers all the time! If you ask them to speak up they just keep repeating themselves, endlessly mouthing the same silent message until they're red in the face! What do they think I am, a lip reader?
I also think they are much younger than I was at the same age. On the other hand, people my own age are so much older than I am. I ran into an old friend the other day and she has aged so much that she didn't even recognize me.
I got to thinking about the poor dear while I was combing my hair this morning, and in doing so, I glanced at my own refection ......... Well, REALLY NOW- even mirrors are not made the way they used to be!
Another thing, everyone drives so fast today!
You're risking life and limb if you happen to pull onto the freeway in front of them. All I can say is, their brakes must wear out awfully fast, the way I see them screech and swerve in my rear view mirror.
The people who make bathroom scales are pulling the same prank, but in reverse. Do they think I actually believe the number I see on that dial? HA! I would never let myself weigh that much! Just who do these people think they're fooling?
I'd like to call up someone in authority to report what's going on -- but the telephone company is in on the conspiracy too: they've printed the phone books in such small type that no one could ever find a number in here!
All I can do is pass along this warning: We are under attack! Unless something drastic happens, pretty soon everyone will have to suffer these awful indignities.
PLEASE PASS THIS ON TO EVERYONE YOU KNOW AS SOON AS POSSIBLE SO WE CAN GET THIS CONSPIRACY STOPPED!
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Produce Shopping
I was examining cantaloupes at the grocery store and turned to the produce clerk, who was refilling the bins.
"Choosing a cantaloupe is like picking a mate for marriage," I observed casually. "A person has no idea what he's getting until it's too late."
"I know," he replied. "I've had three cantaloupes."
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Quick Quotes
"I asked this one girl out and she said, 'You got a friend?' I said yes, she said, 'Then go out with him'" --Dom Irrera
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"I think animal testing is a terrible idea; they get all nervous and give the wrong answers." --Joseph Blosephina
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"I have a detached retina. Actually, it's not detached. It's more emotionally unavailable." --Nick Arnette
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Eye exam
Doug went to the eye doctor for an examination because he was having trouble reading the newspaper. "Now that you're over 40," the doctor told him, "you've developed a condition called 'presbyopia,' in which the lens of your eye can no longer focus as well as it used to."
Seeing his worried look, the doctor tried to be upbeat. "Congratulations!" he said. "You're now officially a presbyope!"
Doug leaned over and asked seriously, "If that means I'm no longer a Roman Catholic, do I still have to go to Confession?"
[This one is in honor of the new Pope Benedict XVI.]
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Thanks,
I am glad Tom won also, he worked so hard while Katie rode the coat tails. I was just wondering why Ian was saying he had a great day and was willing to give up the Million for Katie!
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I was out feeding the kids and got home and got them ready for bed and it was 9:12. I missed the first hour and 15 minutes and I picked up where Ian was making a deal with Tom to jump in and not go for the Million to let Katie be in the top two. Can someone who watched please fill me in. Thanks!!!!!!!
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Joke of the day:
After spying a beautiful blond walking by a man says to God, "God, why
did you make blonde's so beautiful?"
God responded, "So you would love her."
"But God", the man replied, "Why did you make her so dumb?"
God replies, "So she would love you."
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Os Fan,
We have plastic shutters also and we paint them every other year or when they start to fade. We have them painted burgandy and the hot sun really wipes out the color. We called a shutter place in Dallas Shutter Depot, but they never returned our call so we started doing it on our own. Lots of Luck!
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A man walks into an elevator. Just before the door closes, the most
beautiful woman he has ever seen walks in and says "You have 99 floors to
make me feel 100% woman."
The guy thinks to himself, "I am in heaven!"
So he takes off his clothes and says "Here, fold them."
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New Definitions...
Read closely, and perhaps slowly, to understand...
1. ARBITRATOR: A cook that leaves Arby's to work at McDonalds.
2. AVOIDABLE: What a bullfighter tried to do.
3. BERNADETTE: The act of torching a mortgage.
4. BURGLARIZE: What a crook sees with.
5. CONTROL: A short, ugly inmate.
6. COUNTERFEITERS: Workers who put together kitchen cabinets.
7. ECLIPSE: What an English barber does for a living.
8. EYEDROPPER: A clumsy ophthalmologist.
9. HEROES: What a guy in a boat does.
10. LEFTBANK: What the robber did when his bag was full of money.
11. MISTY: How golfers create divots.
12. PARADOX: Two physicians.
13. PARASITES: What you see from the top of the Eiffel Tower.
14. PHARMACIST: A helper on the farm.
15. POLARIZE: What penguins see with.
16. PRIMATE: Removing your spouse from in front of the TV.
17. RELIEF: What trees do in the Spring.
18. RUBBERNECK: What you do to relax your wife.
19. SELFISH: What the owner of a seafood store does.
20. SUDAFED: Brought litigation against a government official.
A Woman's Poem
He didn't like the casserole
And he didn't like my cake.
My biscuits were too hard...
Not like his mother used to make.
I didn't perk the coffee right
He didn't like the stew,
I didn't mend his socks
The way his mother used to do.
I pondered for an answer
I was looking for a clue.
Then I turned around and smacked him...
Like his Mother used to do.
Business Class
I'd been working on my business degree for about a year when I finally got to take a popular finance course. I went to the bookstore to buy the text and was shocked to find out that it would cost me $96. I asked how much it was worth if I sold it back at the end of the semester.
"You'll get $24," said the clerk.
"This is insane," I protested as I wrote out the check.
"I know," replied the clerk sympathetically. "I've always thought that a person who buys a book for $96 and then sells it back for $24 should fail the course."
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Joke of the day:
This guy is walking on the beach somewhere in California. He sees a
lamp, rubs it, and a Genie comes out. The genie is so happy that he
decides to grant one wish to the lucky guy.
The guy thinks about it and says, "I'd like you to build a highway to
Hawaii because I am afraid to fly. The genie responds that this can't be
done because it would be technologically impossible considering the
depth of the ocean and the distance to Hawaii. So he asks the guy to wish
for something else.
The guy thinks about it and, very enthusiastically, wishes he would
understand women.
The genie than said, "Do you want your highway to have 2 or 4 lanes?"
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A Letter to Your Cats and/or Dogs
The dishes with the paw print are yours and contain your food. The other dishes are mine and contain my food. Please note, placing a paw print in the middle of my plate and food does not stake a claim for it becoming your food and dish, nor do I find that aesthetically pleasing in the slightest.
The stairway was not designed by NASCAR and is not a racetrack. Beating me to the bottom is not the object. Tripping me doesn't help because I fall faster than you can run.
I cannot buy anything bigger than a king sized bed. I am very sorry about this. Do not think I will continue sleeping on the couch to ensure your comfort.
Dogs and cats can actually curl up in a ball when they sleep. It is not necessary to sleep perpendicular to each other stretched out to the fullest extent possible. I also know that sticking tails straight out and having tongues hanging out the other end to maximize space is nothing but sarcasm.
For the last time, there is not a secret exit from the bathroom. If by some miracle I beat you there and manage to get the door shut, it is not necessary to claw, whine, bark, meow, try to turn the knob or get your paw under the edge and try to pull the door open. I must exit through the same door I entered.
Also, I have been using the bathroom for years - canine or feline attendance is not mandatory.
The proper order is kiss me, then go smell the other dog or cat's butt. I cannot stress this enough!
To pacify you, my dear pets, I have posted the following 'Rules' on our front door.
Rules for Non-Pet Owners Who Visit and Complain About Our Pets
1. They live here. You don't.
2. If you don't want their hair on your clothes, stay off the furniture. (That's why they call it "fur"niture.)
3. I like my pets a lot better than I like most people.
4. To you, it's an animal. To me, he/she is an adopted son/daughter who is short, hairy and walks on all fours. Although they doesn't speak clearly, they communicate extremely well, especially cats.
5. Dogs and cats are better than kids ...they eat less, don't ask for money all the time, are easier to train, usually come when called (this does not apply to cats), never drive your car, don't hang out with drug-using friends, don't smoke or drink, don't worry about having to buy the latest fashions, don't wear your clothes, and don't need a gazillion dollars for college. Also, if they get pregnant, you can sell the children!!!
Golf Bet
Playing golf with his buddies, George had to make a slick 25-foot putt. As he lined it up, he announced, "I have a dollar bill that says I can make this putt. Does anyone want to bet?"
His three friends eagerly agreed to the wager. Too bad, George missed the putt by ten feet, and his friends gathered around to collect their money.
George pulled out a dollar bill on which he had written, 'I can make this putt.'
His pals are still trying to collect on the bet...and George is too.
Keeping Her Word...
There was a man who had worked all of his life, had saved all of his money, and was a real miser when it came to his money. Just before he died, he said to his wife, "When I die, I want you to take all my money and put it in the casket with me. I want to take my money to the afterlife with me."
And so he got his wife to promise him with all of her heart that when he died, she would put all of the money in the casket with him.
Well, he died. He was stretched out in the casket, his wife was sitting there in black, and her friend was sitting next to her. When they finished the ceremony, just before the undertakers got ready to close the casket, the wife said, "Wait just a minute!" She had a box with her; she came over with the box and put it in the casket. Then the undertakers locked the casket down, and they rolled it away.
So her friend said, "Girl, I know you weren't foolish enough to put all that money in there with your husband."
The loyal wife replied, "Listen, I'm a Christian; I can't go back on my word. I promised him that I was going to put that money in that casket with him."
"You mean to tell me you put that money in the casket with him!!!!?"
"I sure did," said the wife. "I got it all together, put it into my account and wrote him a check. If he can cash it, he can spend it."
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Joke of the day:
A man setting in a bar next to a beautiful lady, who's wearing the
tightest fitting pants he has ever seen. He keeps looking at her with wide
eyes, so she finally asks, "What's wrong?"
He said, "Lady, I hope you don't mind my being too presumptuous, but I
was wondering, just how does a person get into a pair of pants like
that?"
She looks at him, smiles, and says, "You might start by buying me a
drink."
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Joke of the day:
Jim Finn, the noted biologist, was stumped. He'd spent months studying the
little green frogs in the Keefo swamp. The population, despite all efforts at
predator control, was declining at an alarming rate.
Finally, Finn went to the chemistry department at his college to see if anyone
there might be able to help. Tom Trom looked into the problem and came up with
a solution. The little frogs had succumbed to a chemical change in the swamp's
water and simply couldn't stay coupled long enough to reproduce. Trom brewed up
a new adhesive, made from a dash of this, a zoss of that and, most critically,
one part sodium.
"You mean?" Jim said when told.
"Yes," said Tom, "they needed mono-sodium glue to mate."
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15 PIECES OF ADVICE TO BE PASSED ON TO YOUR MUM, YOUR DAUGHTERS OR GRANDDAUGHTERS, NIECES, AUNTS, GIRLFRIENDS, ETC.
1. Don't imagine you can change a man - unless he's in nappies.
2. What do you do if your boyfriend walks out? You shut the door.
3. If they put a man on the moon - they should be able to put them all up there.
4. Never let your man's mind wander - it's too little to be out alone.
5. Go for the younger man. You might as well, they never mature anyway.
6. Men are all the same - they just have different faces, so that you can tell them apart.
7. Definition of a bachelor: a man who has missed the opportunity to make some woman miserable.
8. Women don't make fools of men - most of them are the do-it-yourself types.
9. Best way to get a man to do something is to suggest he is too old for it.
10. Love is blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener.
11. If you want a committed man, look in a mental hospital.
12. The children of Israel wandered around the desert for 40 years. Even in Biblical times, men wouldn't ask for directions.
13. If he asks what sort of books you're interested in, tell him cheque books.
14. Remember a sense of humor does not mean that you tell him jokes, it means that you laugh at his.
15. Sadly, all men are created equal.
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Think About It!
* Money doesn't bring you happiness, but it enables you to look for it in more places.
* Your conscience may not keep you from doing wrong, but it sure keeps you from enjoying it.
* Middle age is when broadness of the mind and narrowness of the waist change places.
* Misers aren't much fun to live with, but they make great ancestors.
* Be careful what rut you choose. You may be in it the rest of your life.
* The trouble with bucket seats is that not everybody has the same size bucket.
* When you see the handwriting on the wall, you can bet you're in a public restroom.
* Opportunities always look bigger going than coming.
* The real reason you can't take it with you is that it goes before you do.
* Junk is something you throw away three weeks before you need it.
* Hospitality is making your guests feel at home, even if you wish they were.
* A closed mouth gathers no feet.
* A man (or woman) who can smile when things go wrong has found someone to blame it on.
* A modern pioneer is a woman who can get through a rainy Saturday with a television on the blink.
* The world is full of willing people: some willing to work and some willing to let them.
* Money isn't everything....there's credit cards, money orders, and travelers checks.
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Church Money
A minister was preoccupied with thoughts of how he was going to ask the congregation to come up with more money than they were expecting for repairs to the church building.
Therefore, he talked with the organist to see what kind of inspirational music she could play after the announcement about the finances to get the congregation in a giving mood.
"Don't worry," she said. "I'll think of something."
During the service, the minister paused and said, "Brothers and Sisters, we are in great difficulty; the roof repairs cost twice as much as we expected, and we need $4,000 more. Any of you who can pledge $100 or more, please stand up."
Just at that moment, the organist started playing, "The Star Spangled Banner."
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Inflated Ego
A man and his wife were lying in bed the other night when he noticed she had bought a new book entitled, "What 20 Million American Women Want."
He grabbed the book out of her hands and started thumbing through the pages.
His wife was a little annoyed. "Hey, what do you think you're doing?"
He calmly replied, "I just wanted to see if they spelled my name right."
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Stay!
I pulled into the crowded parking lot at the Super Wal-Mart Shopping Center and rolled down the car windows to make sure my Labrador Retriever Pup had fresh air.
She was stretched full-out on the back seat and I wanted to impress upon her that she must remain there. I walked to the curb backward, pointing my finger at the car and saying emphatically, "Now you stay. Do you hear me?" "Stay! Stay!"
The driver of a nearby car, a pretty blond young lady, gave me a strange look and said,
"Why don't you just put it in park?"
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Joke of the day:
The minister just had all of his remaining teeth pulled and new
dentures were being made.
The first Sunday, he only preached 10 minutes. The second
Sunday, he preached only 20 minutes. But, on the third Sunday
he preached 1 hour 25 minutes.
When asked about this by some of the congregation, he responded
this way:
"The first Sunday, my gums were so sore it hurt to talk. The second
Sunday, my dentures were hurting a lot. The third Sunday, I
accidentally grabbed my wife's dentures and I could not stop talking!"
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A mechanic was removing a cylinder head from the motor of a Harley motorcycle when he spotted a well-known
heart surgeon in his shop.
The surgeon was there waiting for the service manager to come take a look at his bike when the mechanic shouted across the garage, "Hey Doc, can I ask you a question?"
The surgeon, a bit surprised, walked over to where the mechanic was working on the motorcycle.
The mechanic straightened up, wiped his hands on a rag and asked, "So Doc, look at this engine. I open its heart, take the valves out, repair any damage, and then put them back in, and when I finish, it works just like new.
So how come I get such a small salary and you get the really big bucks, when you and I are doing basically the same work?"
The surgeon paused, smiled and leaned over, and whispered to the mechanic...
"Try doing it with the engine running."
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FYI...
> Subject: Telemarketing on Cell phones begins in a few weeks
>
> > JUST A REMINDER... In a few weeks, cell phone numbers are being
released
> to telemarketing companies and you will start to receive sale calls.
YOU
> WILL BE CHARGED FOR THESE CALLS...
> > To prevent this, call the following number from your cell phone:
> 888/382-1222. It is the National DO NOT CALL list. It will only take
a
> minute of your time. It blocks your number for five (5) years.
> > Additionally, the Federal Trade Commission maintains a website
where you
> can register your telephone on-line against telemarketing. That
website URL
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Joke of the day:
How to tell if you might be a "high tech redneck"
If your e-mail address ends in ".over.yonder.com".
If you connect to the World Wide Web via a "Down Home Page".
If the bumper sticker on your truck says "My other computer is a laptop".
If your laptop has a sticker that says "Protected by Smith and Wesson".
If you've ever doubled the value of your truck by installing a cellular phone.
If your baseball cap read "AOL Sucks!" instead of "CAT".
If your computer is worth more than all your cars combined.
If your wife said "either she or the computer had to go", and you still don't
miss her.
If you've ever used an AOL CD-ROM as a coaster to set your beer on.
If you ever refer to your computer as "Ole Bessy" or "Darlin".
If your screen saver is a bitmap image of your favorite truck, tractor, or porno
star.
If you start all your e-mails with the words "Howdy ya’ll" or "Hey Bubba".
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Joke of the day:
Did you hear they just released a new Barbie doll called "Divorced
Barbie"?
Yeah, it comes with all of Ken's stuff.
What's the problem with lawyer jokes?
Lawyer's don't think they're funny and no one else thinks they're
jokes.
Good Puns
Energizer Bunny arrested - charged with battery.
A pessimist's blood type is always b-negative
I used to work in a blanket factory, but it folded.
If electricity comes from electrons... does that mean that morality comes from morons?
Sea captains don't like crew cuts.
A successful diet is the triumph of mind over platter.
Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
Without geometry, life is pointless.
When you dream in color, it's a pigment of your imagination.
Reading whilst sunbathing makes you well-red.
When two egotists meet, it's an I for an I.
Alarms: What an octopus is.
Dockyard: A physician's garden.
Incongruous: Where bills are passed.
Amish Carriage
While driving in Pennsylvania, a family caught up to an Amish carriage. The owner of the carriage obviously had a sense of humor, because attached to the back of the carriage was a hand printed sign... "Energy efficient vehicle: Runs on oats and grass. Caution: Do Not step in exhaust."
Confused
After driving up and down several lanes, I finally found a parking spot at the shopping mall. I noticed another man driving very slowly in the same direction, and, since he was closer, I gave him the "Are you going to park there?" look.
His responding gestures were very confusing. First he shook his head. Next he pointed at me, then at the parking space and then at himself, his watch and the mall. Finishing off, he frowned, raised his palms upward and shrugged. Once I parked, I walked over to the driver to make sure he didn't want the space.
"You must be single," he replied. "If you were married, you would've known that was the universal sign for 'Go ahead and take the spot. I'm waiting for my wife.'"
Jury Selection
The tiresome jury selection process continued, each side hotly contesting and dismissing potential jurors. John was called for his question session.
"Property holder?"
"Yes, I am, Your Honor."
"Married or single?"
"Married for years, Your Honor."
"Formed or expressed an opinion?"
"Not in many years, Your Honor."
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Joke of the day:
A very shy guy goes into a bar and sees a beautiful woman sitting at
the bar. After an hour of gathering up his courage he finally goes over
to her and asks, tentatively, "Um, would you mind if I chatted with you
for a while?"
She responds by yelling, at the top of her lungs, "No, I won't sleep
with you tonight!" Everyone in the bar is now staring at them.
Naturally, the guy is hopelessly and completely embarrassed and he
slinks back to his table.
After a few minutes, the woman walks over to him and apologizes. She
smiles at him and says, "I'm sorry if I embarrassed you. You see, I'm a
graduate student in psychology and I'm studying how people respond to
embarrassing situations."
To which he responds, at the top of his lungs, "What do you mean $200?"
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Joke of the day:
An old country doctor went way out to the boondocks to deliver a baby.
It was so far out that there was no electricity. When the doctor
arrived, no one was home except for the laboring mother and her 5 year old
child.
The doctor instructed the child to hold a lantern high so he could see
while he helped the woman deliver the baby. The child did so, the
mother pushed, and after a little while, the doctor lifted the new born baby
by the feet and spanked him on the bottom to get him to take his first
breath.
"Hit him again," the child said. "He shouldn't have crawled up there in
the first place!!"
funnies
in Internet Cafe
Posted
A young ventriloquist is touring the clubs and one night he's doing
a
show in a small town in Arkansas.
With his dummy on his knee, he starts going through his usual dumb
blonde jokes when a blonde in the 4th row stands on her chair and
starts
shouting:
"I've heard enough of your stupid blonde jokes. What makes you think
you
can stereotype women that way? What does the colour of a person's
hair have to do with her worth as a human being? It's guys like you
who
keep women like me from being respected at work and in the community
and from reaching our full potential as a person. .....because you
and
your kind continue to perpetuate discrimination against not only
blondes, but,
women in general, and all in the name of humour!"
The embarrassed ventriloquist begins to apologize, and the blonde
yells................,
"You stay out of this, mister! I'm talking to that little bastard on
your knee."
********************************************************************************
**************************************
An Indian walks into a cafe with a shotgun in one hand pulling a
male
buffalo with the other. He says to the waiter, "Me want coffee."
The waiter says, "Sure chief, coming right up." He gets the Indian a
tall mug of coffee.
The Indian drinks the coffee down in one gulp, turns and blasts the
buffalo with the shotgun, causing parts of animal to splatter
everywhere, then just walks out.
The next morning the Indian returns. He has his shotgun in one hand,
pulling another male buffalo with the other. He walks up to the
counter
and says to the waiter, "Me want coffee."
The waiter says, "Whoa, Tonto! We're still cleaning up your mess
from
yesterday. What was all that about, anyway?"
The Indian smiles and proudly says, "Me training for upper
management
position: Come in, drink coffee, shoot bull, leave mess for others
to
clean up, disappear for rest of day."