So sorry you're hurting, And I know how you feel. I lost my dad Memorial Day 05 from a massive heart attack. We had been home from there house about 30 mins when my sister called and said something was wrong with my dad. I immediately went over there (1.5 miles from my house) and the paramedics were working on him. There's not a day that goes by that I don't think about him and Miss him... it hasn't gotten any easier and I don't think it ever will.
You'll be in my prayers