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About this blog

My bemusings and beliefs...

Entries in this blog

My ramblings at 4:52 A.M. when I can't sleep...again

Every now and again the universe decides to send you a day that just smacks you around a bit, a day that leaves you bruised and a little more broken on the inside than you were before. You know, the type of day that just reminds you how truly insignificant you are in this great, big universe and reminds you exactly where you are on everyone else's lists of priorities. I suppose that these days are good in a way--they assist us in keeping our egos in check, help us to re-evaluate priorities of

bwitchy

bwitchy

Barking Up the Wrong Tree

As I'm sitting here unable to get more than a couple of hours of sleep, my mind tends to race and wander, and for some reason tonight it keeps coming back to this one situation from a few years ago. This took place before we moved to the Paulding County area, We were still living in a very small subdivision where many of the owners had pets. Most of the owners were very responsible and kept their pets in their back yards, almost all of which were fenced in with tall privacy fences. However,

bwitchy

bwitchy

Tis the Season...for year end reflection

Although technically my tradition's new year begins at Samhain, I always take time to pause and reflect upon the end of the calendar year as well. Marking time is an excellent way to mark one's own progress and transitions, and I always try to take a little time to evaluate where I was this time last year and where I am now and hope that I am better off. For many years, it did not seem to be so. Each "new year" simply brought promises of what *could* be rather than a celebration of what is/was

bwitchy

bwitchy

Trust Issues

I can openly admit that I have trust issues. As much as I would love to be more open and allow people to come closer, I simply can not bring myself to do it. I'm suspicious by nature. I've been burned too many times by people whom I thought I could trust, and I'm simply not willing to allow myself to be vulnerable like that again. I suppose the "once bitten/ twice shy" rule applies.   Now, I don't think that makes me a "bad" person or even an unusual person in today's society, but it d

bwitchy

bwitchy

I'm up early and this has been on my mind lately anyway...the loneliness beast

During a conversation on the board the other day, another member and I started speaking about loneliness in its various forms. Certainly there is the physical state of being alone, but there is also the mental state of feeling alone. Surely you can have one without the other, as we have all experienced that feeling of being in a crowded room, yet feeling mentally alone while surrounded by others. Likewise we have all experienced the solitude of no one around and yet not felt lonely because we

bwitchy

bwitchy

Playing dumb IS really dumb...

More and more these days I am struck with the wanning intelligence of our society as a whole. I suppose what grinds my nerves the most are those who continually "play dumb." I always have to ask myself the question, "Are they really playing? And, if they are, then what do they possibly hope to gain from doing so?" I have come to the conclusion then, that one can not simply "play" dumb without actually being stupid. Sadly there are enough folks out there who simply lack real mental capacity-

bwitchy

bwitchy

Letting go and moving on...

Why is it that some people have more trouble letting go of things and moving forward than others? It's something about which I've wondered for some time. As I've said before, I am very much a "live and let live" kind of person. What may be your cup of tea may/may not be mine. I truly believe we are only accountable for our own actions and no one elses--we can't really control others, so why try? It is a waste of energy and very non-productive both physically and mentally. It's difficult en

bwitchy

bwitchy

Early Summer Musings!

Once again this morning I'm feeling a bit reflective, and one of the things foremost on my mind in light of recent events in my personal life is the notion of men and women being friends. Friendship is a tenuous thing. When we are young, we make friends quite easily--boy, girl, doesn't really matter. Taking it back to the sandbox... Being in the same place at the same time is enough for us to call another human "friend." Then as we grow up, society teaches us that friendship is a much more co

bwitchy

bwitchy

Feeling meditative this morning...

Are people really that complicated, or do we just like to pretend we are? I mean, how much of the crap that goes on in our lives do we do to ourselves? Is being complicated considered a "good" thing? I think if you ask 10 people what they really wanted out of life, the majority (if not all) of them would say something leading back to "simplification," being it a less stressful job, less hectic lifestyle, less drama-filled relationships. It’s kind of sad and funny when you think about it.

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bwitchy

Stabalizing...

I've not blogged in quite some time, but I feel as my one year "anniversary" approaches, it is time for an update. It was in March of last year that me and my now ex seperated. At the time, I was completely devestated. It's amazing to me the difference a year makes.   Over the past year I have really learned a great deal about myself. And, I realize (as I think most people do with time) that even the most "devestating" experiences happen for good reason. I know now that while my time wi

bwitchy

bwitchy

New house, new life, new ME?

Yep, I've cleaned my physical house so to speak and have gotten many things in order over the past year. It has certainly been a year of changes for me, but what of the non-physical--i.e. "spiritual" house? That, too, needs cleaning, and I feel it is time to tackle it.   Most of you know that I've been on this board for a little over two years. I'm sure that some of you were displeased with some of the changes you've noticed over the past year, especially in my behavior and attitudes towa

bwitchy

bwitchy

Cha-cha-cha-changes

Well, I suppose this is my year of fresh starts b/c it looks like I'm going to be moving this summer on top of everything else.   I'll still be in PC, but we (the kids and I) are looking to move into a house that's bigger than where we are now, and it's a swim community, which is a big plus for the summer. If I don't go completely crazy this year, I'll be doing well!   Now, what are those "high stressers" again?

bwitchy

bwitchy

The Beginning of Phase 2

I know I've not been posting as much over here lately (for a variety of reasons); however, I am sure that some of the regulars have picked up on the fact that I am in the process of getting a divorce from my husband of almost 17 years--my "high school sweatheart." I've not made a huge deal about this b/c I am not one, for the most part, to air my personal business on a public board. Nevertheless, I do feel a little clarification is needed with regards to this matter.   It has been a very d

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bwitchy

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