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Christmas gifts for older married children


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#1 RaidersRock

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Posted 09 December 2009 - 01:52 PM

my son got married earlier this year and I don't quite know how to handle his and her Christmas this year. Money is tighter than years past and I still have 3 at home. I just wanted some input from others who are/have been in this situation. I know his Christmas will be smaller as will the other kids but I am just not sure how to balance it. Am I making sense at all?? :wacko: :pardon:
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#2 CarolineElizabeth

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Posted 09 December 2009 - 01:56 PM

You could get them something together instead of seperate. This way you are kind of buying for one and not two :)

#3 NC-17

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Posted 09 December 2009 - 01:56 PM

two of the three older girls are married, with kids now.
we used to give each of them a gift card for the same amount.
then when the two older ones got married we gave the couples the same amount as the youngest daughter.
now that they have kids, they get nothing. the kids each get toys in the amount of the gift card that the youngest still gets.

fair? not sure. but my budget couldn't handle multiplying the way the family size did.

Edited by NC-17, 09 December 2009 - 01:57 PM.

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#4 Mrs G

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Posted 09 December 2009 - 01:57 PM

Yes, you are making good sense. I'd set a limit on each one. If you can't afford much just get them a shirt, or something like that. At least make it something they can use or wear. Try to stay away from the "as seen on tv" stuff, they usually don't work and aren't worth the money!! Good Luck. All of our children are grown, and it sure is hard to figure out what to get them!! We also have 9 gradchildren, between us.
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#5 momof 3

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Posted 09 December 2009 - 02:02 PM

How about a gift card to the movies for the two of them and if they have kids an offer of babysitting for their night out.

#6 QueenOfFaith

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Posted 09 December 2009 - 02:03 PM

Get them something for their home.

#7 ladybug82525

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Posted 09 December 2009 - 02:05 PM

my son got married earlier this year and I don't quite know how to handle his and her Christmas this year. Money is tighter than years past and I still have 3 at home. I just wanted some input from others who are/have been in this situation. I know his Christmas will be smaller as will the other kids but I am just not sure how to balance it. Am I making sense at all?? :wacko: :pardon:

Last year I did things that they needed for the house, things that were pratical but things they just would not go out and buy themselves. They each got one thing that was just for them.
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#8 RaidersRock

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Posted 09 December 2009 - 02:06 PM

I got a really good deal on a gift card for her from Rue 21, it cost me $50 but with the certificates and rue bucks she can spend $100. But then my son told me she doesn't like rue anymore(she did 2 weeks ago) :glare: oh frigging well, too late. I don't know what to get my son, I'm thinking a gift cert. for him to but I just don't from where. I thought about getting them a cert for the movies.

i appreciate the input ^_^
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#9 weatherboy

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Posted 09 December 2009 - 02:09 PM

two of the three older girls are married, with kids now.
we used to give each of them a gift card for the same amount.
then when the two older ones got married we gave the couples the same amount as the youngest daughter.
now that they have kids, they get nothing. the kids each get toys in the amount of the gift card that the youngest still gets.

fair? not sure. but my budget couldn't handle multiplying the way the family size did.

I agree with NC we stopped buying for the kids and only buy for the Grandkids.Tell them when they leave the nest the eggs are going to stop. :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: Just kidding Folks.

Edited by weatherboy, 09 December 2009 - 02:14 PM.


#10 CarolineElizabeth

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Posted 09 December 2009 - 02:14 PM

I agree with NC we stopped buying for the kids and only buy for the grandkids.



I do not like this idea. lol

#11 RaidersRock

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Posted 09 December 2009 - 02:17 PM

I do not like this idea. lol

lol, I know. My dad doesn't do that either. Now I feel bad :blush:
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#12 I'm Floored

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Posted 09 December 2009 - 02:22 PM

You could tell them that you are going to do a gift exchange, and if they want to open a present, they need to bring one. Then let them know you'll keep the gifts at your house for them to enjoy when they visit. :ninja:

I keed, I keed!

Don't get mad....I'm just joking....trying to lighten the mood!

And now that we're older, the grandkids get most of the gifts. We parents each get a small gift from my mom (I usually ask for my annual bottle of Tommy Girl perfume.) My husband gets a gift, too. He always feels cheated....I don't know why. He got a REAL NICE carbon monoxide detector a couple of years ago!

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

#13 RaidersRock

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Posted 09 December 2009 - 02:23 PM

You could tell them that you are going to do a gift exchange, and if they want to open a present, they need to bring one. Then let them know you'll keep the gifts at your house for them to enjoy when they visit. :ninja:

I keed, I keed!

Don't get mad....I'm just joking....trying to lighten the mood!

And now that we're older, the grandkids get most of the gifts. We parents each get a small gift from my mom (I usually ask for my annual bottle of Tommy Girl perfume.) My husband gets a gift, too. He always feels cheated....I don't know why. He got a REAL NICE carbon monoxide detector a couple of years ago!

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

:blink: it took me a minute, but..............that is dern funy :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:
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#14 weatherboy

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Posted 09 December 2009 - 02:32 PM

I do not like this idea. lol

When you have Six Grandkids And Four grownups not counting me and my wife and live on a fixed income it just got to be to much. Anyway it's not in the things that you buy the best gifts in life are free. I don't want or expect my kids to buy me anything with all of the kids and in-laws to buy for it is just to much. I have never been the type to go buy things that I can't pay for when I buy them.I don't believe in taking all of the next year to pay for Christmas. Just my way of thinking. :p :p :p

#15 Harlee71

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Posted 09 December 2009 - 02:38 PM

two of the three older girls are married, with kids now.
we used to give each of them a gift card for the same amount.
then when the two older ones got married we gave the couples the same amount as the youngest daughter.
now that they have kids, they get nothing. the kids each get toys in the amount of the gift card that the youngest still gets.

fair? not sure. but my budget couldn't handle multiplying the way the family size did.




You are still Mom, and now G-maw. Don't be scrooge too!!! ;)

#16 RaidersRock

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Posted 09 December 2009 - 02:39 PM

You are still Mom, and now G-maw. Don't be scrooge too!!! ;)

she's gunna kick your butt, haha :p
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#17 Harlee71

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Posted 09 December 2009 - 02:40 PM

my son got married earlier this year and I don't quite know how to handle his and her Christmas this year. Money is tighter than years past and I still have 3 at home. I just wanted some input from others who are/have been in this situation. I know his Christmas will be smaller as will the other kids but I am just not sure how to balance it. Am I making sense at all?? :wacko: :pardon:



Give him a good home cooked meal. He's probably not getting that now that he is married.

Edited by Harlee71, 09 December 2009 - 02:40 PM.


#18 RaidersRock

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Posted 09 December 2009 - 02:42 PM

Give him a good home cooked meal. He's probably not getting that now that he is married.

they come over sometimes and she seems to be feeding him well. Trust me not worried about him starving ;)
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#19 sugail

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Posted 09 December 2009 - 03:10 PM

I still have a 14 year old at home but I also have 5 grandchildren. I usually buy a gift certificate for the family to go to their favorite restaurant, and small gifts for the grandkids.

#20 CABYEYE

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Posted 09 December 2009 - 03:17 PM

my son got married earlier this year and I don't quite know how to handle his and her Christmas this year. Money is tighter than years past and I still have 3 at home. I just wanted some input from others who are/have been in this situation. I know his Christmas will be smaller as will the other kids but I am just not sure how to balance it. Am I making sense at all?? :wacko: :pardon:

When we got married and moved out. My parents (for Christmas) bought us things we used. Toothpaste, DO, soap, towels, shaving gel, razors. Pratical items that helped us along in our new married life. :pardon: Worked for us. I enjoyed not having to by those items for 6 months. She bought him toothpaste, me toothpaste. Like two-three big things each. Etc. so we got like double everything. But now she did start at the first of the year and collect it all year long. So there would be a huge box of items that we used daily and it helped us thru the year.

#21 NC-17

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Posted 09 December 2009 - 03:21 PM

You are still Mom, and now G-maw. Don't be scrooge too!!! ;)



i don't believe we're acquainted. i'm not their mom, nor am i a grandmother. i married their father after they were grown
and actually, i prefer not to celebrate christmas at all, being that i do not subscribe to the christian religion.
but i'm happy to buy gifts for little children. :good:

that scrooge-ish enough for ya? :huh:

#22 RaidersRock

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Posted 09 December 2009 - 03:36 PM

i don't believe we're acquainted. i'm not their mom, nor am i a grandmother. i married their father after they were grown
and actually, i prefer not to celebrate christmas at all, being that i do not subscribe to the christian religion.
but i'm happy to buy gifts for little children. :good:

that scrooge-ish enough for ya? :huh:

Harlee, :p :p :rofl: told ya so!!!


love ya NC :wub:
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#23 MrsB

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Posted 09 December 2009 - 04:17 PM

Now, I don't have kids, but I am a daughter-in-law.

I am getting to the age where whether I get a gift or not doesn't really bother me (unless it pertains to my husband, of course :D ).
From my MIL, I told my husband that if she asked, I wanted
a batch of her yummy spaghetti sauce for my freezer that will last me a couple of months. I'd even buy the stuff if she'd make it (as my tummy is growling)

If they lived closer, it'd be awesome if she gave me a "gift certificate" to cook me & MrB dinner one night. Or, ACTUALLY - if she gave me a "gift certificate" to do my dishes once or twice.

That's cheap, and would be what I really wanted.

ETA: Not that I think my MIL is only good for cooking or cleaning, but she is an awesome cook, and I HATE dishes.

Edited by MrsB, 09 December 2009 - 04:19 PM.

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#24 crazy4u

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Posted 09 December 2009 - 04:22 PM

New towels or sheets are always good. After a year it's always nice to get new towels. It's those things you love to get but hate to spend the money buying them for yourself.

#25 PauldingMommy

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Posted 09 December 2009 - 07:25 PM

I just told my mother-in-law this morning.....please don't buy us anything...we have told all family that we only buy for children...no adults. When we did buy for adults, it was meaningless gifts just so they would have a gift from us to open. When you can't recall the gift that you received last year from a loved one, you should stop buying gifts...they are meaningless. I will still do something thoughtful if the opportunity arises such as a great photo in a frame. I do bake cookies with the kids and put them in tins and pass out to family and friends...love that!

#26 lowrider

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Posted 09 December 2009 - 07:33 PM

Money is tight for us this year as well, so I bought my grown children things they need and can use.

My son and his wife needed new pots and pans and a knife set.

Believe me, I didn't spend anymore than usual, we went to Brandsmart and got some great deals.

My daughter and her husband got clothes. I shop Ross a lot!

I got some great deals at JCP last Sunday, I had a 25% coupon and a 15% coupon and got to use both of them on sale items.

And they'll be happy with what they got and will use it.

And I like the idea of towels and the toiletries.

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#27 trueheart

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Posted 10 December 2009 - 12:36 AM

My daughter was married earlier this year. They moved to Washington about 3 months ago. She has called me several times to ask "Mom, how do I make your ____?" or "What do I need to buy to make your _____?". So their Christmas present this year was a collection of "Mom's Recipes". I bought a recipe box and matching cards from Michaels. I wrote down the recipe and directions of every meal that my daughter enjoyed from childhood until now. I gave it to her last week when she was in town visiting. She said it was the best present and was exactly what they needed. Materials cost $15.00 plus time spent writing them all down........priceless. I also left a couple packages of blank cards in the box for her to add her own recipes to it in the future. A gift from the heart means all the difference and doesn't have to cost an arm and a leg.

#28 Raider Mom

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Posted 10 December 2009 - 05:33 PM

I have two girls that have their own children now and we have a 15 year old. the two older girls are getting a 25.00 Visa gift card and a gift basket from Wal-Mart. Their children are small one is 15 month and he is going to get Tonka trucks and the baby needs a high chair. We are not exchanging with family or friends this year. It has been a hard year.
My 2 favorite people call me Grandma and the other 3 call me Mom.

#29 CreativeOne

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Posted 10 December 2009 - 05:48 PM

New towels or sheets are always good. After a year it's always nice to get new towels. It's those things you love to get but hate to spend the money buying them for yourself.

Or get them those items like flannel sheets or big bath towels which are "luxuriant" items.
Maybe a heavy micro-fleece type blanket?

....... new pots and pans and a knife set.

................


Items I love!
When asked, those are items I put "on the list" in days past.
Most items I got when first married were good, but to get a good quality/lasting items it has taken a while. If I just got one "lifetime" knife or new pots (heavy steel) was a treasure!

My daughter was married earlier this year. They moved to Washington about 3 months ago. She has called me several times to ask "Mom, how do I make your ____?" or "What do I need to buy to make your _____?". So their Christmas present this year was a collection of "Mom's Recipes". I bought a recipe box and matching cards from Michaels. I wrote down the recipe and directions of every meal that my daughter enjoyed from childhood until now. I gave it to her last week when she was in town visiting. She said it was the best present and was exactly what they needed. Materials cost $15.00 plus time spent writing them all down........priceless. I also left a couple packages of blank cards in the box for her to add her own recipes to it in the future. A gift from the heart means all the difference and doesn't have to cost an arm and a leg.

What a wonderful gift!
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#30 blessedwithboys

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Posted 10 December 2009 - 06:43 PM

We've got grown, married children and a 5 year old who still expects Santa. Money is extremely tight for up, one of the oder boys is even helping with Santa for his brothers. We've always given equally (money wise) to all of our children (indluding my DIL) until last year. This year we probably won't be able to buy for the grown kids. I'll be getting them something very small for Christmas and then trying to do a little more for them after Christmas... because I want to, not because I have to. :)
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#31 tess

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Posted 10 December 2009 - 08:09 PM

My Husband's brother & sisters agreed to take the money we would have spent, and donate to a needy family[usually someone from sister's church]
we are all adults and the presents were always a problem trying to figure out what they needed or wanted,,,this takes the stress out and I think we all
feel more festive if we give and not receive....I am an only child so my family is easy.....just Mom & Dad...
I give the others $$ ..I set a limit and everybody gets the same amount.....

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#32 I'm Floored

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Posted 10 December 2009 - 08:18 PM

When we got married and moved out. My parents (for Christmas) bought us things we used. Toothpaste, DO, soap, towels, shaving gel, razors. Pratical items that helped us along in our new married life. :pardon: Worked for us. I enjoyed not having to by those items for 6 months. She bought him toothpaste, me toothpaste. Like two-three big things each. Etc. so we got like double everything. But now she did start at the first of the year and collect it all year long. So there would be a huge box of items that we used daily and it helped us thru the year.


I think that is a wonderful & thoughtful present! I will remember that for when mine are on their own!

My daughter was married earlier this year. They moved to Washington about 3 months ago. She has called me several times to ask "Mom, how do I make your ____?" or "What do I need to buy to make your _____?". So their Christmas present this year was a collection of "Mom's Recipes". I bought a recipe box and matching cards from Michaels. I wrote down the recipe and directions of every meal that my daughter enjoyed from childhood until now. I gave it to her last week when she was in town visiting. She said it was the best present and was exactly what they needed. Materials cost $15.00 plus time spent writing them all down........priceless. I also left a couple packages of blank cards in the box for her to add her own recipes to it in the future. A gift from the heart means all the difference and doesn't have to cost an arm and a leg.


That's a great gift, too!

#33 asdfasdfasdfasd

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Posted 10 December 2009 - 08:23 PM

If you want to get them something they can use and possibly don't have...I think an electric griddle is about the best kitchen gadget I have ever bought. Even if I am not making a big breakfast, it is still so convenient not to have to use a bunch of different pans. Great for making several pancakes at once or just bacon and some eggs. I really love mine and nothing EVER sticks to it. I don't know what brand it is...would have to look...but I bought it at Wal-mart for like $20.

#34 MissSophie

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Posted 10 December 2009 - 08:32 PM

my son got married earlier this year and I don't quite know how to handle his and her Christmas this year. Money is tighter than years past and I still have 3 at home. I just wanted some input from others who are/have been in this situation. I know his Christmas will be smaller as will the other kids but I am just not sure how to balance it. Am I making sense at all?? :wacko: :pardon:


I like to buy a "together" gift plus one or two small and inexpensive personal gifts.

For example - a gift certificate for a restaurant; and then for small gifts - gloves, a candle, a scarf, slippers, pajamas, socks, etc.

I don't think grown and married kids need as many presents as those still at home. Christmas is for the kids.

#35 lovecanbuildabridge

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Posted 10 December 2009 - 08:39 PM

I picked up a few of these today (and they had more left in stores not online) at Staples. It works out to about $40 each after tax but they will think it was much more :ninja: I will pre- load my son and daughter in laws with their wedding photos.. and let the others put family photos on theirs... it is very nice and 12 inches!

http://www.staples.c...3:CG43:CL163473

#36 Armymom

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Posted 11 December 2009 - 07:51 AM

These days, money is tight for almost everyone.
Maybe consider "drawing names". My parents suggested this once we were all married and it worked really well. :)
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#37 mrshoward

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Posted 11 December 2009 - 08:16 AM

Once my siblings married and began having children
I started purchasing one "family" gift for each household...

I always make sure it is something
that all members of the home can enjoy :

A DVD movie, a fun board game, or a nice cozy throw blanket.

I usually pair it with some hot chocolate mix, big bag of M&M's,
or family size box of popcorn for a little extra treat...
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are not men as honest as himself who may differ from him in political principles.


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#38 davidj6

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Posted 11 December 2009 - 08:18 AM

We're with the others....as soon as the kids/grandkids/nieces/nephews, etc. are married, we get a "couples gift" until they have kids....then, they get nothing.....I don't think that's cruel since usually they don't buy anything for anyone other than "maybe" their parents...

#39 MrsB

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Posted 11 December 2009 - 08:26 AM

My daughter was married earlier this year. They moved to Washington about 3 months ago. She has called me several times to ask "Mom, how do I make your ____?" or "What do I need to buy to make your _____?". So their Christmas present this year was a collection of "Mom's Recipes". I bought a recipe box and matching cards from Michaels. I wrote down the recipe and directions of every meal that my daughter enjoyed from childhood until now. I gave it to her last week when she was in town visiting. She said it was the best present and was exactly what they needed. Materials cost $15.00 plus time spent writing them all down........priceless. I also left a couple packages of blank cards in the box for her to add her own recipes to it in the future. A gift from the heart means all the difference and doesn't have to cost an arm and a leg.

That is such a wonderful gift!! What a great idea. My mom did something similar a couple of years ago, too. I had forgotten about it until I read this. I have made her recipes so many times I have them memorized. Not to mention the book was covered in sauce and other food bits from the mishaps of the early days LOL.
"The way I see it, if you want the rainbow, you gotta put up with the rain." ~ Dolly Parton

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#40 MrsB

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Posted 11 December 2009 - 08:34 AM

If you want to get them something they can use and possibly don't have...I think an electric griddle is about the best kitchen gadget I have ever bought. Even if I am not making a big breakfast, it is still so convenient not to have to use a bunch of different pans. Great for making several pancakes at once or just bacon and some eggs. I really love mine and nothing EVER sticks to it. I don't know what brand it is...would have to look...but I bought it at Wal-mart for like $20.

This is what I asked my husband for. I really, really want one!
"The way I see it, if you want the rainbow, you gotta put up with the rain." ~ Dolly Parton

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